Damn It! Buy my crap!

I am trying to clean out my basement of all the furnature and junk that accumilates over a long period of time. In fact my basement was so bad that I had no idea my husband was hiding an ENTIRE WEIGHT BENCH. I didn't know it was there. No lie-so I'm selling it to. I have enough crap to outfit an entire 1 bedroom apartment neatly, and 2 bedroom streatched. What I don't understand is why somethings sell and some dont?

I have posted on Kijiji, and two of my local swap N' buy sites on facebook (herein refered to as FB). I've done my research on the items posted on there so I can go accordingly lower to move this junk trove of treasures. I've sold 1 stroller-and everything else sits in my living room anxiously awaiting its new home...which it appears is my livingroom as opposed to the basement. I go on to these sites and I see open bargining of prices and occassional "2nd in line if item falls through" even up to 3rd or 4th. And the prices agreed on I have a heart attack thinking "dear god go to a yard sale and get it for $0.25" So I've posted some of the same things, and for cheaper I might add-and nothing. My pictures are rudely pushed back one page to the next with no respect.

Here is my theory as to why it doesn't move like those over priced things. I don't know these people, have no knowledge of the secret hand shake, and am to honest in my postings. I'm thinking instead of "Or best Offer" I'm going to write "PRICE FIRM >:-P". I will even use the devil face smilie icon to show how serious I am. I might even add "don't bother asking for a lower price because I'm HARDCORE BITCH" and then maybe I'll get a response. It must be because women like a challenge. A fixer upper. We need it to feel good about ourselves. So we bargin, lecture and plead our way to a lower price in the hopes the other person will feel like they'll need a shower by the time we're done with them. Its like the sleeze bag project every women will undertake at one point in time. We may not date them "but hes such a great sensitive friend". Lady I'll tell you why hes so sensitive HE SLEEPING WITH YOUR ROOMMATE or possibly looking down your shirt. Maybe using you for cable? I don't know why hes a sleeze and you're surprised when you find out. I do know Mr. Scummy Hottie Sleeze Bag isn't buying my stuff.

Any way as it stands, I'm slashing prices LOW LOW LOW. Come to my yard sale you might get an entire work out weight bench thingy for $25.00 and a coffee table for $5.00. I've added pics of crap I'm selling, make me an offer.

Battle of the lack of wallet bulge.

I buy used-there I said it. I'm to poor to buy new on everything I need. Baby stuff, maternity cloths, heck regular cloths in general-all to pricey for my tastes. I even buy my girls cloths used-not all of them. I figure kids this age (4 years and 6 months) grow so fast most clothing doesn't have time to wear out. So I hunt for deals, specials, and in general the extras that I want but can not afford. I scour on-line local sites, thrift stores big and small, garage sales, Kijiji. Also my favorite-the Facebook pages dedicated to city specific sales of items. Ranging from baby socks to couches and anything in between. Now I believe in negotiating-the old fashioned haggle. I start lower than I'll actually pay and by the time I hit the price I think is fair most people think they've won. I'm horrible I know-but I'm very good at it. Its how I bought a barely used king sized bed WITH bedding for $175.00. I find though, its not the big ticket items are hard to find the good deal on-its the kids toys, clothing and various small items.

Nothing drives me more nuts than people who think they're doing you favor by charging you $4.00 for a rattle that went through all three of their kids. Its okay that charge that apparently because they spent $6.99 at BabiesRUs six years ago for the thing. I see it all the times with those exersaucers and bouncy chairs. They range in price brand new $39.99 on sale to $75.99 and beyond. Seing some one charge $50.00 FIRM on the same exersaucer I bought USED five years ago for $30.00 makes me angry for the poor person they're going to take for that ride. I can't even look at most of those pages any more, they make me so mad. Mad at the price and mad at the women posting it. Yes I said women, women trying to appease thier angry husbands. Anger over a spending habit thats gone way to far out of check. I don't even bother asking for a lower price any more, time and time again I recieve a snarky reply about how "I guess I can, but I'd rather not". All I can think is "lady it's not my fault you feel guilty for paying full price on a baby einstein item. I don't have to come and take what is essentially your garbage off your hands". I also tend to find its like they're doing YOU the favor by charging you to much for a kids toy that you could have bought on sale at wal mart in 3 weeks. My favorite is when a few weeks later I over hear people complaining about how those things NEVER work. Pfft lower your prices and see who comes out of the wood work.

And it gets better its what I call "The Brand Name Clothing Drop". Now I"ve recently-and by recently I mean in the last two years-been lucky enough to have a very large mall open within 10 minuets of driving distance from my front door to the parking lot. This mall has a number of high end brand name stores. These stores are CONSTANTLY clearing out inventory at $5.99 and under. I was able to out fit both kids for the fall/early winter for just under $300.00. This includes coats, pants, shoes, tops, hoodies, hats, mits, and jammies. I came online to check some stuff out and there it was. Most of the stuff I just bought brand new for $3.99 and under and item. The line under the pictures read "Paid $29.99 an item, GREAT DEAL $10.00 tops $15.00 bottoms. Childrens Place worn once". The audacity of some people! Thank you I'd rather be taken for a ride at the stampede!

I believe in paying it forward. There are a lot of people out there who can't afford a bumbo chair, much less a safe car seat. By paying it forward I mean GIFTING some cloths my girls aren't going to wear any more. DONATING my toys to the local "Best Beginnings". A GREAT organization helping set up mother on low incomes to take care of thier kids, and babies. They help with blankets, coupons, food, clothing and anything you can possibly imagine. Buying, selling, gifting used has many great benifits also. You pay less than retail, you aren't contributing to the land fill crisis. If you're selling you get a couple bucks, a good feeling of helping and your basement is cleared out. Now with all this being said I'm not adverse to a good yard sale. We have way to many kids books to be considered acceptable to donate, an extra couch, extra dishes, and many items that I thought were a good idea at the time. To be honest I dont' want this crap in my house so its been priced to sell. You mean $5.00 for a coffee table or OBO?! Why yes, yes I do!

Pay it forward; good people who need good quality items sometimes just can't afford it need all the help they can get. Have a mind set of "If I was in a situation where I just CAN'T AFFORD new what would my budget be?" and go from there. I wish everyone happy buying/selling! Ps Don't be an ass hole about it, people talk and the interweb remembers all!

Teaching The Doc about "Granola"

Today Elizabeth and I had a follow up appointment to check on her recovery from "failure to thrive". So off we went to her pediatrician's office to have her weighed and her milestones checked, she has managed to gain a little over 3 pounds in just under a month! Since at four months of age she was just at her birth weight of 7lbs 11oz-her birthweight might actually be 7lbs 7oz we don't know there were two diffrent numbers written on her paper work, and the usual picture of baby on scale didn't turn out. I like to go with 7lbs 11oz it makes me feel like a stronger woman-you know like men and thier size issues? This is mine.

Anyway I digress-so there we are Elizabeth naked as a shrieky jay bird with an amber teething necklace around her neck and me trying to hear the Doc over the cute "baby talk". And I realized she was really concerned this thing is around her neck. It has amber beads, each is individualy knotted so that if it were to break theres only one choking hazzard as opposed to thirty. The clasp is also designed to break easily just incase she gets any bright ideas to hang herself with it.

Amber has been used for thousands of years as a natural pain reliever. Its suppose to release "healing oils" to diminish the pain from teething, and trust me this drooly thing is definatly teething. There is even some scientific research to support a release of chemicals that affect the body. Well thats what Dr. Google had told me anyway-and if it didn't work I figured I had this adorable drooly shreaky baby that just happened to be fashionable.

Dr. S had never heard of this before and thought it was the coolest thing-so I naturaly wrote down the website where I bought it from! This is where she admited she'd rather alot of the parents try some home remedies before demanding to see her for every little thing, so like it or not even your doctor wants us all to be a wannaBE natural parent! There was much more to the appointment thats blog worthy but this impressed me enough to keep me thinking on it.

I've included the link to the site I bought the necklaces' off. Its a great site with all kinds of natural, green products to make your "granola" choices easier. Not to mention its Canadian-which helps me since I always feel guilty buying over the boarder, like I'm stealing from my economy that keeps me on EI and at the computer.

http://www.morethanclothdiapers.com/amber_jewelry.html

Home birthing works for alot of people!

I know I had earlier written a blog on home birth, but alas in the crazy world of computers was deleted some how while blogger was doing upgrades or something fun. I figured this meant it was my chance to write something a little more pro/con and not so story board.

Home birth is a very personal and intimate choice. Not only are people going to be up in your privates but they are also going to be in your home, they will be in your space, your sanctuary and most of all-your bedroom! There are alot of pros and cons to such a harrowing decision-really at the end of the day it comes down to research, hospital policies and your own personal beliefs.

The reason Neil and I had decided to go through with an attempted home birth-I say attempted because if the baby or I were dying I wasn't adverse to an ambulance ride to the hospital-was to keep it personal. This whole thing wasn't only a decision on home birth, it was also a decision on Midwifery. Since in Canada a doctor won't attend a home birth. I'm terrified of natural labor-always have been, it hurts and lets be honest theres alot of leakage afterwards. However I'm more terrified of being cut open and having my guts on display. Here is a copy of our list of pro/cons

Con:

• No easy access to drugs should I change my mind


• If there was an emergancy there would be drive time to the hospital either by car or ambulance.


• Any one could show up at my house unannounced or unwanted (not that would have happened but it COULD have)


• Accepted as a client on a conditional basis-was not guaranteed to stay in midwifery care. ie: gestational diabeties, planned c-section, disorder with the baby detected, or any other reason they would feel a home birth would endanger both the life of the baby and myself.

Pro:

• Didn't need to be discharged to go home! Baby and I were already there.


• My hubby could spend the night, in Calgary unless you are in active labor your spouse or signifigant other has to leave the hospital by 11pm and return at 8 am.


• My daughter could participate if she wanted to-she could climb into the tub with me, or go into her room and play with her barbies, and if it was the middle of the night we didn't need to find a sitter or wake her to go to the hospital.


• There is a much lower rate of C-sections, even if we did end up at the hospital.


• There was no strange bed, strange room-or roommates.


• I was guaranteed one of my midwifes would deliver my child-not someone on call at that time, I'd never met before.


• I was allowed visitors-once again in Calgary they limit who can come, grandparents and siblings only. Thats it no exceptions.


• I could go with delayed cord clamping, and baby led nursing/latching. I was also able to do skin to skin right away and not have the baby taken from me to me weighed and measured.


• this one is what convinced Neil he was going to do it. He was able to help deliver the baby himself, he would be able to help catch his daughter and cut the umbilical cord.


• There was life saving equipment in case of an emergancy-they were able to turn my bedroom into a mini hospital room to help baby until the ambulance arrived if it did come to that.


• There was immediate help with breastfeeding-as well as multiple visits through out the first two weeks to help with baby and any questions that might pop up.

For us it was an easy decision, and what most people don't realize is that a midwife can do nearly anything an OBGYN could do. Including order all the standard tests and extras if they felt it was necessary. This isn't a rant against medical intervention or advancements that have saved the lives of millions of mothers and babies. Its an informative decision we made-if you think about it, if it weren't for all those advancements we wouldn't be able to give birth at home so safely and freely. As it happens we did need to go to the hospital-which we were thankful for the chance to TRY it out at home. Thats all we wanted, even when I did end up screaming in pain and cursing myself an idiot for not doing the epidural again.

There is so much to consider and so much information to read and digest for yourself before you come to this choice. I hope every woman has the opportunity to make the decision thats right for her and be as confident as I was in mine.

Why I'm so angry with formula

When I gave birth to Elizabeth I had decided I was going to try REALLY hard to breastfeed. I had taken out books from the library and even bought the ones I knew I'd refrence in the future. So the initial period of discomfort passed as we learned to latch, and how to read her cues. I was very excited we were off. Except something was wrong-she wasn't gaining weight, actually she was loosing-rapidly. After an inital weight gain she had droped back down to just a few ounces over her birth weight at four months of age. She threw up. ALOT. it was kinda her thing, but the problem was her thing could kill her if we didn't get in to see a pediatritian soon.

After many strings pulled and a visit to the Calgary Childrens Hospital we were in, the first thing the doctor did? Told me to suppliment with formula. All my books told me this was wrong, that this is what the formula companies did to brainwash these doctors with samples and "evidence" to create more cash flow. But if I'm so smart of a mother to breast feed and give my oldest whole grains, I'm also mother enough to admit-I'm not a doctor. I took the sample home to try. So I've been pumping and adding the powdered formula to the milk to increase her caloric intake. It was working! Elizabeth was gaining like a champ-5lbs in just over 3 weeks. I was so PISSED OFF.

I had busted my butt to get this kid breastfeeding. and not just feeding, but doing it very WELL. My supply was fine, and here I was a rare case that my breast milk didn't have enough fat. I was and still so resentful. She needs this stuff and I"m angry that shes getting better? Its simple-that pesky annoying emotional bond that the books say Dad gets jealous of. I WANT IT. So badly. and all of sudden hes as pleased as punch to help out-to bad all I could think of was kidney punching him. I wanted to be one of those moms yelling at thier 2 year old to quit playing with her shirt at the park-weird I know but after my early success I had grand plans. Not to mention this put a serious dent in my need to climb upon that exclusive breastfeeding pedistal that raised me above the mere bottle feeders. Shes still throwing up all the time but at least she has a weight gain going-so I should be happy shouldn't I? Thats the next problem to fix.

In the mean time is it wrong of me to take pleasure from her only wanting me in the middle of the night? Since I can't have my exclusive breastfeeding experience I was so crazy about? Things will get better I know, and I should be thankful we have found such an easy solution to her problem.

Date Night a natural Mommy Phenomenon?

For the last few months my husband Neil has been demanding a date night. Just me and him, no kids-booze, and maybe just being with each other. As long as we find a sitter we both agree on. Little did he know, a good friend of ours Hannah has been offering for WEEKS. And like a good natural mom I've been saying no thank you. I can do this on my own. Its how this goes-he provides ingredient number 2, to produce baby and I take care of them. This goes with my breast feeding and cloth diapering.

This week marked a turning point in mine and Neils relationship. I have been complaining for MONTHS about the massive weight gain with my last pregnancy, but this week it really killed me. I couldn't even look at him, couldn't even fathom what he found attractive in me. So I was refusing to go out with him or even any of my friends. Instead of kicking up a fuss at how wrong I was and rushing to my side, he very quietly commented he missed me and closed our bedroom door.

This had me thinking a little bit-you mean a marriage isn't about ME? MY kids? when I want to go out? When we are intimate? So after much gossipy talk with friends alike I decided if I found a new outfit I like I would go out. Well, after an emotional trip to Wal-mart we found something and Hannahs offer was accepted.

Something very special happened tonight over dinner and wine, I discovered something that I'd forgotten about. My husband is FUNNY. I ENJOY his company. Does this "date night" when my baby is only five and half months old take me off the "granola path?" or is it a necessary evil we all must emotionally battle from time to time? Who knows maybe the girly martinis will wear off in the morning and I will feel really guilty. But tonight I'm happy I found my hubby again.

Yours Truly,

half a bottle of wine, a steak dinner, cheese cake and 2 Jolly Rancher martinis!