Well I had proof yesterday that old habits die hard. And that I'm a stress eater. I know what every one is thinking "oh god not another fat woman telling me why shes stressed out". But I'm going to confess something, and then tell you the REAL reason why we eat crap food when we're angry and stressed out.
I ate cheese, and pizza. It was delicious veggie lovers pizza. All processed to crap and back. then I had a lobster artichoke cheese dip. It was AMAZING. In fact sitting here writing about it makes me wish to order more. I feel horrible. I'd gone a whole 6 DAYS with out animal products. not even sugar. which we all know I LOVE. There's proof here.
I had a holy hairy, I want to hide melt down. And since in that moment I knew it was ethically, morally wrong and ILLEGAL to punch someone in the throat or kick someone in the private bits. I ate. Delicious animal derived FOOD. I couldn't kill something myself-so yesterday I took pleasure in knowing something-many somethings died for my enjoyment. I LOVED it. I ate with enjoyment. Basking in the residual carnage of the calf that was ripped from its mother so she could be milked to make processed cheese product. The lobster that was more than likely caught using bottom trawling, where the odds of an entire echo system being wiped out are high.
The worst part? At Brewster's I ordered a VEGGIE PATTY. Like a horrible pretentious vegan. Like I was making a change in the world. Then SENT IT BACK. I came home and ordered a large veggie lovers. Then ate most of it.
So there it is. We don't eat to fill an emotional need. We eat to prevent murder.
Today was a new day, and yesterday is done. Today, I'm a pretend vegan again. It's a good day.
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